Paying with my soul and my self worth for the demise before me.
Creeping into this self I refuse to let go of.
Leave it behind and who knows what Ill be.
I mask all of this pain and hurt with a face of stone and drugs of power that keep me from feeling.
Cover my head and cry beneath a sheet of regret and woe.
I can’t get this out of me.
It’s all become part of my being.
I relish the loneliness
and I preserve the energy stored as hate.
I pity this womb that used to be my home,
but now houses are only self righteousness.
I cant keep up with contradictions vilely puked forth
by a mother hen that sees not past her beak,
but only to peck your heart out and feed it to you.
This all consuming hatred for her,
and for them.
It blocks the center and keeps me from the healing thats needed for survival.